A nightclub dancer in Phoenix posted a video claiming she does like many of her customers.
On January 21, Violet Stormi (@violet.stormi) posted a video sharing her thoughts on being a “skripper.” As of this writing, the video has received over 10,000 views.
“You know what makes me sad as a Scrip person?” she asked.
What insights do the dancers share?
Stormi mentioned that a common joke is that when dancers tell customers they love them, they are lying. “You at least want to know my secret, right?” she asked. “I can’t speak for the other girls in the club, but for me there are some customers that I really like.”
She added that if customers put in the effort, she might like them. “If the atmosphere is right, you’re nice to me, you tip me well, and you respect me, [then] I really like you and when I say I have a lot of fun hanging out with you, I mean it,” she added.
She explained that many customers didn’t believe her when she said this. “Sometimes I lie,” she admits. “But most of the time, if I say that, I actually mean it.”
Many of the comments were from women in similar jobs and echoed her sentiments. “Man, there are some customers I miss when I don’t see them for a while!” one commenter wrote. “It’s like having a registration in any other job.”
“Same,” another added. “I’ve had some of the same regular customers over the years and I really care about their well-being!”
“No, seriously, there are some people I really care about but they don’t think I care about them and it’s sad,” wrote a third.
Where does this shame come from?
Research into dancer-client dynamics shows that when dancers say “I love you” to regulars, people joke that the dancer’s patterns don’t come out of thin air, but those patterns don’t really mean it.
Studies show that dancers often smile, flirt, and talk attentively, making patrons feel seen and appreciated. This can lead to increased tips and repeat business. Early research referred to this dynamic of “fake intimacy,” which is an immediate intimacy at work that is not necessarily a real personal relationship in the usual sense.
Anthropologist Katherine Frank’s ethnography “Thongs and Compassion” highlights how regulars sought not only entertainment but also emotional affirmation and social connection through repeated visits and interactions with dancers. Some men view these relationships as if the dancers were girlfriends, even within the regulated environment of a club.
Jokes and shame about dancers when they say they like a customer are “unintentional,” in part because these commercialized exchanges of emotion are interpreted through cultural views of moralized sex work and gendered labour. Due to the sexual overtones of the dance pieces and the fact that dancers are often stereotyped as performing solely for money, audiences will assume that any affection expressed is fake, even if the dancer truly likes certain patrons.
AllHipHop has reached out to Stormi for comment via TikTok private messages and comments.
@violet.stormi Random skripper’s thoughts of the day 🖤 #midnightballerina #skripper #facetimecall #thoughts #starbucks ♬ Shadow Glow – NathSoulz
